The pressure that rests on the question: “How to find your purpose?” is enormous. For some reason you feel that when you fill in that blank it’s there forever. You only get one shot to get it right and to live it out. But what if finding your purpose evolved? What if your purpose was ever changing?
When you consider your “life purpose” you’re really just asking, “what is an important and intentional way to use my time”?
When you think of it that way you take some pressure off and you look at it in a new light.
Yes, finding your purpose stems from your own special gifts and abilities as well as your talents and passions but it also comes from what you view as important and where you want to spend your time.
As we dive into purpose this week on The Unhurried Life Podcast we uncover some uncommon perspectives that I believe hold a lot of weight when it comes to finding your purpose.
This is a 6 week series called Becoming Bold and our dream is for you to go through this with a friend. We’re giving you the tools to make the change, to take control of your life, and start living in a way that honors yourself and your family. All you have to do is tune in, print the weekly worksheet and find a friend to go through it together.
Finding Purpose in Life
Why is finding purpose in life such a common question? Why is it a place you have a tendency to get hung up on?
It’s true, having a purpose helps you become established in discernment and gives you direction for making choices in life.
But sometimes you may find yourself losing confidence because you don’t have a direction. But remember for every season your purpose and what’s important to you will shift.
Purpose looks different in different seasons. SO many things are seasonal. Maybe this season is not the season for this or that but coming up you can revisit something you’re passionate about. Try not to use final words when describing your purpose or passion.
Wynne says it so beautifully when she reminds us in the podcast, “you can be everything you want to be, just not all at the same time”!
When it comes to finding your purpose in life you just have to be enough for everyday but not all the days. You’re also not going to discover your purpose in life on your own. In fact as you begin to find your purpose you’ll see others along the same road as you and start to notice…here is your community.
My Life Purpose
When it comes to discovering your life purpose it’s key to surrender your own desires and to be obedient so that you flourish doing what you’re called to do.
“God has made us what we are. In Christ Jesus, God made us new people so that we would spend our lives doing the good things he had already planned for us to do.”
As Wynne talks about their journey through adoption and in business she points out that our next big thing may not be for us, it may be to serve others. Keeping in mind that our purpose is not going to be for our ego or our bank account. I know that sounds blunt but maybe you needed to hear that. It’s hard to admit but I did.
Finding your life purpose is not going to come easily. In fact it’s work to sit and establish your purpose. It takes a strategic plan and time set aside.
For example, when I first started working through finding my purpose I had to schedule calls with a good friend to take place weekly with the sole purpose to find purpose. We went through a series of questions and processes to sift through what was life giving and what we were just doing that had to be done.
When you sit down to process through what’s important to you it can be tempting to surf the web. Check Instagram for what others are doing but instead of consuming first, create first. Create a routine that’s filled with what a priority is. Create a life that brings you joy before you check on what others do with their lives.
We all process differently but to fully understand how you process try sitting still and getting to know yourself. If you’re watching everyone else’s life you’re not diving into your life. Do ‘you’ first so you don’t get distracted or discouraged.
When it comes to living intentional with purpose make a mind shift from ‘about me’ to about ‘others’. Trusting that who ever is supposed to see or hear what you’re saying will hear it. Instead of going out and searching for those people you’re supposed to influence or help, allow those people to be naturally woven into your life.
Some of the best times for me have been when I put tech down and reconnect. Looking in the right place for my identity and purpose. I love taking walks with out my phone or having a full ‘phone fast’ on Saturday where my phone stays on silent in a drawer. Giving yourself space and freedom to manipulate your day for life giving activities.
It’s common to be tempted to put your identity in what you produce, how much you make, how many followers you have, or how you’re raising your children. (Been there!) These are rolls you play but they are not who you are. You are greater, what is your story?
It’s natural to want to be noticed and appreciated and see the benefit of your hard work. But what does it look like to show up and be faithful over fruitful?
What we do may not produce fruit in our own time and that’s hard to grasp and be okay with. Be obedient and faithful to what you’re being called. Live with intention in your everyday and don’t get swept up in the supposed to’s.
Three Steps to Finding Your Life Purpose
When you’re diving into finding your life purpose you need to plan for a moment to be still. I’m not talking during nap time or one evening after the kids are in bed. I’m talking a strategic plan with chunks of time to dive deep into what’s important in your life for you. NOT what anyone else has told you and that takes time to sift through.
“Stay joined to me (abide) and I will stay joined to you. No branch can produce fruit alone. It must stay connected to the vine. It is the same with you. You cannot produce fruit alone. You must stay joined to me.”
John 15:4 ERV (mine)
I’d be fooling you if I said you could do this all on your own. You were created by an amazing craftsman. When looking at your life through your own lens you’re missing a big part of it. Abiding and joining with Him is where you need to begin when it comes to finding your life purpose.
Here are 3 steps to finding your purpose that can also help you hone in.
Step 1: Know Your Season
As babies are born and kids start school seasons are changing. Be aware of your season and what is important for now knowing that purpose shifts and is not always and forever the same.
Recognizing your season and your purpose for the season you’re in can lead toward knowing how to say yes or no in different things. When you know what needs a yes and what needs a no you’re giving proper weight to activities.
Step 2: A Legacy Perspective
Thinking about your legacy – finding time in your life to really consider this – during quiet time or on a walk where you can truly reflect brings your purpose into a more clear perspective.
Taking the time to think about what you want your kids to say about you when you’re gone, gives you clarity to think about the decisions you’re making in the day to day.
Step 3: Proper Weight and Time
Giving weight and time to the decisions that will be bigger impacts on life. Deciding on where to send our son to school vs. what’s for dinner.
For example, in the middle of the pandemic we were trying to decide where to send our 5 year old to school. What would kinder look like for him and us? We needed to give this decision more time than “what to make for dinner”. We approach our decisions with a weighted scale and when we make lists we always assign values to each thing.
Rather you’re making a pros and cons list for things you enjoy and want to keep in your life or simply making a list of your extracurriculars. Assign a weight (scale of 1-5) for each thing and then give each item the proper amount of attention.
Another good question to ask yourself is: Will this matter in 5 min, 5 weeks, 5 years? Knowing the answer to that question could immediately relieve stress and point you closer toward your purpose and what’s the most important use of your time.
It’s time to ask the hard question. What’s really stopping you from taking action? If you only get one life to live and your most precious resource is time…why are you letting it slip away?
Overcoming the roadblocks we may not even know are in our way is tough. Wouldn’t it be helpful if there were some tools, some go to techniques to get you back on track?
That’s what next week’s episode is all about. This is a 6 week series called Becoming Bold and our dream is for you to go through this with a friend. We’re giving you the tools to make the change, to take control of your life, and start living in a way that honors yourself and your family. All you have to do is tune in, print the weekly worksheet and find a friend to go through it together.
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